Anel has tried out for her school's cheerleading squad for the past three years, starting as a 5th grader. The first time, she didn't make it. She claims her nerves got the best of her. As a 6th grader, again, she didn't make it. She claims her "toe touch" was not high enough. As a 7th grader, she tried out again, pretty confident this would be her last tryout - she made it.
The first two tryouts that didn't turn out as she had hoped, were an opportunity to teach a 'life lesson.' Many times, at life, we try, we try and still don't succeed. Sometimes, it's perhaps the notion that we think we've tried hard enough or prepared enough, when in fact we haven't. Or perhaps other times, it's just fate, it wasn't mean to be. I used those 'failed' opportunities to try and send the message, that sometimes things just don't turn out the way we hoped for. It's a hard lesson for adults, much harder for a child/soon to be teenager. You hear the usual, 'it isn't fair, why me, I'm just not meant to do this, etc...' And perhaps some of these complaints are valid. But, they don't get you closer to your goal.
Frankly, I didn't push the issue any of the three times. I asked her what she wanted and to go ahead with it. I did try to fill in the 'void' of not making it the first two times. We tried cooking/baking lessons, other things to make her feel successful at something.
This last time, she was more prepared and more determined. She practiced her toe touch. She perfected the routines. She wanted it bad. I always try to prepare my kids for worst case scenario. Maybe it's my maternal instincts kicking in. In spite of all this preparation, I reminded her, you still may not make it. You have to be ready for that too. I know, I know, positive thinking. But after being married to Herman for quite some time now, his philosophy of, "Prepare for the worst and hope for the best" has rubbed off.
So the day came, she tried out, and said she felt confident. Then the waiting game began. A few days later, I hear a yelp. "MOM, I MADE IT!"
It's so great when our kids accomplish something they wanted so bad. It's just cheerleading, I know, but I think a good valuable lesson came out of it. If at first, you don't succeed, try and try again. I hope she keeps that thought tugged right near her heart. She will not always succeed, I realize that. But she won't stop trying.
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